Saturday, September 24, 2016

THE LAST LETTER: A LESSON FOR ALL PARENTS

This is the story of an Indian teenage girl Mehak who apparently committed suicide due to excessive parental pressure. This was the letter she wrote to her parents before she took her last breath.

Dear mom and dad,
You must be wondering why I am writing you this letter when we live under the same roof. I wanted to tell you a few things that I couldn't ever say to you face to face. I want to thank you for everything you have ever done for me. You took really good care of me. I remember the time when I topped in first grade. I can still see that trophy right in front of me. You motivated me to study hard. I am your only daughter and I know that you have always loved me. You did everything for me. But that wasn't enough. Now you must be wondering how can everything not be enough? 
        
        Read this sentence again- 'You did EVERYTHING for me'. You took all the decisions for me too. I was never given a chance to do anything for myself. I hope you remember my childhood. The routine was same for everyday. I woke up in the morning, went to school, came back from school and sat down to study as per your instructions. With great difficulties you granted me 45 minutes for playing outside with my friends. After those precious moments of freedom you called me from the middle of a game and stuck me to that dreadful study table again because apparently according to you getting good grades in exams was above all! Your motto was 'Academics is life'. Pardon me for correcting you- 'academics is just a part of life, not the whole life.' Like enjoyment is a part of life which by the way never occurred to you. You wanted me to be a geek and of course I had to pursue science. So I joined a coaching institute in order to get enrolled into one of the best engineering institutes. It was a matter of prestige for you. I was quite determined to study diligently and clear the entrance examination. Throughout these two years of high school I felt like a caged bird with its feathers cut off. I was suffocated. When I couldn't manage my academics with preparation for the big entrance examination, it was like I was losing a game. I had never lost before. Thanks to you I was accustomed to winning! No one taught me how to handle defeat. I was also trying to get over a broken friendship and relationship. You never approved of me dating anyone. In fact you punished me for dating a guy in high school. Remember the time you grounded me and took my cell phone away? Of course you do! According to you dating was a distraction for teenagers. I totally agree with you! But it is a part of life. Instead of constantly trying to refrain me you should have taught me how to deal with various aspects of life together. 

        Time of results was near. What I always feared happened although I knew it was coming. I didn't get into the top university. You said the utmost bitter words to me. You blame me and cursed me. Wasn't I upset enough? There is something all parents should understand. When your child fails all that is needed is some comfort from your side at that particular time. Was there any need for you to pile up on my existing grief and failure? To be very clear I didn't exactly fail the examination, I failed you. I failed myself. I failed life. You don't even know that I aspired to become a writer. You know why? Because I wasn't allowed to express myself. I was always put under the pressure of walking in your shoes. 

        Of course you loved me. But that love was too much too take. You were trying to hold on too tightly. I can feel my life falling apart right now. I have realized that to build a bright future, I have completely ruined my past and present. My smothered soul needs to be set free. I am exasperated from the shackles that have bound me to my cage and now I am ready to break free. You have always made all decisions for me, but this is the choice I am making for myself."


As she bled herself to death, another innocent soul wept along with many others caught in the undertow.

        

42 comments:

Princely Paws said...

I really liked the way how you wrote this. In today's cut throat competetive world most parents place unrealistic expectations or just dont tell their children how its ok not to be the best at everything. Just give your best that is all which is needed

Love 30 said...

What a lovely honest letter. Being able to express yourself as a child and as an adult is so important. And support and encouragement when things go a bit wrong. There's always a way to fix it . Ree Love30

Carola K said...

Tough story.. So she committed suicide. She had courage to write the letter. Though it was also already to late. It's so sad it had to go this way. Feeling free to be yourself is such an important thing.

Anna Nuttall said...

What an honest post. You wrote with honesty and I can almost hear you speak this outloud. Thank you I enjoyed reading. xx

www.annanutall.com

Damian Sz said...

That's really tough topic to go through. Good lesson for parents indeed...

Essere Moda said...

Wow, while reading I got a lump in my throat. This is so sad :( But a very good lesson for parent.

-XOXO-

Blair Villanueva said...

Whatever the problem is, suicide will never solve your problem, it will only leave bad marks to your living love ones.

Tina von S said...

That is so powerful. I am lucky enough that my parents didn't really care what I do with my life, so they never pressured me into doing what I want. The problem with suicide is, that it doesn't end the pain, but it passes it on to somebody else.
Tina von S | http://lifestylerookie.com/

Tania Potter said...

This is horrendous, and I wonder, with an aching heart, how many other kids are feeling this same pressure right now.

Stardust said...

Wow. This seemed very sad to me, but also a very honest posting.


Jenine | http://prescribinghealth.com/superfoods/

Jolina said...

We really shouldn't underestimate the pressure on kids these days. Hope this opens a lot of eyes and hearts!

Liz Mays said...

This is so sad. Clearly she was under a lot of pressure. It really is important to let your kids have their freedom.

ana de jesus said...

It is awful but sadly true, some parents put too much pressure to succeed and academics is not for everyone. Poor girl x

Bella said...

This is heart breaking but has a great message. Suicide is a scary subject especially when it comes to these young kids.

Elizabeth O. said...

How sad and heartbreaking but also very true to the core. Many parents think they are doing what's best for their kids without thinking about what their kids are feeling or without taking their child's wants and needs into consideration.

Carrie Rundhaug said...

Such a sad and profound story... Pressure from our parents can be extremely hard to deal with and we as parents have to remember that even though we want the best for our children above all we should be their number one cheerleaders.

Daisy J. Crawford said...

Wow, the struggles of this poor girl. I hope one day we'll put an end to helicopter parents. Parents need to let their children shine.

Rosie Romance said...

Such a poignant message. Feeling that suicide is the only answer must be the most awful situation. Obviously, parents only want the best for their children, but it's so important that they listen to their children too. Parents don't always know best.

Gabrielle Crystal RoseBonniee said...

As I can remember, I was having almost the same tough times as well. When I was little, at primary school. But thanks God I had at least a bit of courage and told my mom about my feelings and the problems with "my regime" back then. Of course, other family members helped me a bit as well. I remember, how scared I was when it came to it. This story is so painful to read. I can´t understand, why some parents do that. In case I will have a child/ren in the future, I want him/her/them to study proper as well. But everything has its own limits. As someone above me already said - it´s also a good eye-opening for someone´s eyes.

leXHansplaCE said...

i learnt a thing or two from this post but the sadness and hurt that comes with it is deep, suicide is never an option like everyone has said, sometimes somethings come for a deeper reason than we can ever imagine but at the end of the day, sun comes after the rain...

Dreammer In said...

Well written... Tough story and very sad!! Good lesson for parents indeed...!

Inyene Udom said...

Suicide is never an option for any human, irrespective of what causes the sadness. There is always light at the end of the tunnel. This post is a great lesson for both parents and kids.

eztravelbaby said...

Some parents have greater expectation for their children because they were not able to achieve it themselves. What they wanted to aim gets pushed to their children.

MrsMeganLeigh said...

That is so sad. I wish she had the opportunity to speak with her parents before she did such a selfish act.

Jennifer L | Modern Chic said...

Wow great post! Parents as much as they love us can also try to enforce their own dreams on us. Which although meant with good intentions can really stifle our own dreams too, especially when they don't get that they lived their lives already and now its our turn.

Laveena Sengar said...

Life is tough. Nothing is simple but we need to learn to deal with things in life. Suicide is not a option ever no matter how bad the problem is.

Dunja said...

This is heartbreaking. They probably loved her, but the worst kind of parents are the ones that force their kid to make THEIR dreams come true, instead of kid's own dreams.

Kriswanders said...

Suicide is something I would not take as an option to end my problems. This is totally heartbreaking. I can remember my dad being stiff and all but realized it's for the better when I get older. Don't keep your emotions to your self at all times. Learn to talk to them. They may be harsh but they'll listen.

The Graceful Mist said...

The letter is a clear indication that there was miscommunication or misunderstanding. A lot of parents see academics as a ticket to all things possible. A lot of them may just want the best for their children so they keep pressuring them. However, when children feels like there`s something wrong with their life, they must express their feelings towards their parents. Most parents just want us to have a good life which is why open communication and open-mindedness are truly important to solve family issues.

With Love, Grace ❁
www.TheGracefulMist.com

Pospi Otuson said...

This will be so so beneficial to parents, its a really interesting story. Thanks for sharing

Sana's Ramblings said...

Suicide is not an option to end problems but a coward thing to run away from problems. Life is not a bed of roses always x

Funke Olotu said...

Wait, this is a fictional post right?? Please tell me it is, it's so sad but suicide is never an answer

Megha. said...

Nice post.

Ester Tamm said...

I can feel it. Same thing basically happens to me. I am like a marionette doll for my parents - everything needs to be done by they say. No matter how much I explain or try to clear myself, it does not matter. I recently moved out, started uni and going to work, i have been inedependent for an year with this things got better. I have done a lot of research about that topic cuz what I have been suffering had broke me apart. It's called toxic parents... sorry i got too personal and sensensitive.... altho whatever I wanted to tell you it touched me and things like that are serious business.

Inyene Udom said...

Exactly, that is why I believe that parenting should be learned and all family members should also have respect for each other.

Inyene Udom said...

Exactly, that is why I believe that parenting should be learned and all family members should also have respect for each other.

Jivita Rane said...

The mishaps in recent times, shows the burden on the childern. The parents must understand that every child is different and with different abilities. Parents must not push theri child byond limit.

lindaikejisboy POSPI said...

you sounded so motivational * Ester Tamm *

Don Fidel said...

I've got tears in my eyes right now

NooDz T J said...

I'm in love with the way you write. I have parents like this and I can totally relate to this

Louisa said...

I guess as parents sometimes we can push our kids too hard to do things we think is best for them. As much as possible I try not to do that but it can be very difficult not to want the best from your child all the time. I like what you said about having to learn how to accept failure. That's one of the best ways to learn and grow.

Laveena Sengar said...

This was really intense. It touched my heart and I can understand what the person must have gone through. Parents need to understand better but suicide is not something I will ever be supportive of. It's life and tough times are a part of it.

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